So, the realization just hit (feeling somewhat like being shoved in a freezer after basking in the sunlight; in honor of Gabriel and his lovely simile...:), that I have no talent of great import in the world and that, wherever I go, there will always be more talent and more grace and more amazingness in other people.
:D
Isn't that wonderful?! Think about how exciting the world is, now that I do not need to be the best person in it. There are so many wonderful things to do; so many masterful artists to learn from and so many ridiculously talented people to appreciate.
*smacks self into agreement*
Ah, Perfectionism!
It's like trying to write a good stories while reading the Bible or Jane Eyre or T.S. Eliot or Harry Potter or Chicken Jane, and wondering, "Why on earth write a good story when there are such GREAT stories?" and it feels so utterly hopeless that you edit your pages into oblivion. Or like learning a piece by some nondescript composer that nobody knows about, when your brilliant friends are struggling through divine classics that are close-if-not-actually-at the virtuosic level...
Or trying to draw. At all. Without even looking at Rembrandt, or Degas, or Monet...(aw, I love Monet!). Cause if you look at Monet, when you're trying to draw, it's basically the equivalent of being shoved into an iceberg after living in California.
*sigh*
What is the point of this post? That's a very, very good question. Maybe it's...
The more you learn, the more you grow, and (oddly enough) the more humble you become. At least, that's how it should be, I think. I fail more often than not in remembering and applying this.
Plus, if we were all the best, we wouldn't have any motivation to learn, would we? (Well, none of us could ever be the best, since God has handily taken that position. Heck, he made that position! He IS that position!)
Anyways. I've been learning about the woes of pride and perfectionism, and about the grace of God and the necessity of humility.
In other news, I ate Milton's wheat toast with cream cheese and marionberry jam for breakfast, and I miss you guys. :D
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2 comments:
AHHHH!! It was so worth the wait to read this post. =D Every time you write on here I just about fall over in truth. What you said about learning and humility was spot on. It's the greatest saints who are most aware of their dependence on God's grace. And I'm so happy that we can share this journey of creation and learning. =] I also love this line "(Well, none of us could ever be the best, since God has handily taken that position. Heck, he made that position! He IS that position!)" We'd kidnap you back to Cali, but it'd be a sin to take you away from gorgeous Washington! Let's keep on growing souls. =]
Mmm! Hurrah for this post! Tis' a wonderful reminder for me for why we learn and try, even when we're surrounded by so many brilliant, amazing people! Your breakfast sounds simply scrumptious. :D
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